Ethiopia- Day 3: Fear and Unknown

I slept great.  Jason not so much.  The plan was to go to two museums.  I have to admit that I don't love museums.  I have been to many in my lifetime, and there are only a hand full that I can say I really enjoyed.  I may be putting myself in the cultural clod category, but trying to keep it real.  The first museum was the University museum.  We had a guide, but I had such a hard time understanding him, and quite frankly his breath was so pungent I couldn't listen well.  I feel bad saying that.  He was seriously the kindest man, and, obviously, very smart.  Ethiopian traditions and history are so rich and intriguing.  In one of the tribes the boys right of passage is tested by having to run naked across the backs of a bunch of standing ox.  We will not be practicing this tradition in the Holdridge house.  You hear me, Jason?  We will NOT.

A random foosball table--but it made it's way into the museum

This used to be their pillow.  ouch!

Very interesting how some of the tribes build shelter

The culture is very Christian.  The story of the life of Christ was primarily told through pictures

This boy was selling gum for food.  So respectful and kind.

behind us is a massive throne.  Jason wants one...

Mancala:  The game originated in Ethiopia, and our girls play it all the time.  Very cool discovery.

We stopped for lunch at the Green View.  I'm such a safe food eater, so had pizza again.  Not my favorite.  Then we got to go spend a couple of hours with Joshua again.  They usually schedule family visits from 2-4.  The problem is the children take naps after lunch, and are often still asleep at 2.  Joshua is apparently a deep and long sleeper, but the nannies went in and woke him up (Mulenesh was not there, and the others really didn't speak much English, so when I said we will wait for him to wake up they didn't understand me).  So they brought out a very disoriented and sleepy little boy that was holding back tears, and wearing a sad face with a pouty lip.  We attempted to have him sit with us, and go outside, but he was so tired and shy, so we let him lay back down for a bit.

He wanted nothing to do with candy even... It was kind of funny,  even one of the nannies grabbed a skittle and shoved it in his mouth, but he spit it out.

So we just sat and waited with Brandon and Emily.  The nannies were watching Ethiopian Idol on an old TV like my grandparents used to have when I was little.  The picture was really fuzzy, and the contestants were horrible.  Emily was so funny, because the sound was making her cringe.  As soon as they walked out of the room for a second she jumped up and turned it down.  But their way of singing is even so different than ours.  I like Carrie Underwood a lot better.

Once the other four children were up Joshua was a little less afraid to hang out with us, but he was still scoping us out.  He knew we had fun to offer (of course!!:).  So we pulled out the bubbles, and the kid came alive.  Smiles, squealing, giggling it was awesome.  Then we distracted him with the soccer ball and he loved that too.  He knew to kick the ball.  He stood like a pro to play catch, and he would swat at the ball like it was on a baseball tee.  He's going to be in some sport I'm sure:)

                                                     
                                      
                                      

 

 

They only have a small dirt courtyard to run and play in.  Little did we know in playing with this precious little girl that she was Rob and Kara's (once we arrived at our hotel Rob and Kara went on a trip to meet Anya's grandfather, so we didn't see them for a couple of days).  Joshua will get to grow up knowing her, because they only live 45 minutes from us!!

Then Jason pulled out his phone, and it was all over...

When we said goodbye we hugged Joshua, and all the kids ran over and waved, and then the one little girl that needs to be a Holdridge:) came over, hugged me and kissed me on the cheek.  Joshua wouldn't wave or anything, so I turned towards our van, and then everyone got all excited, because he waved! UGH! I missed it, so we kept waving to try to get him to wave again to no avail:(

We went to the Friendship Cafe for dinner having to once again pass up the children begging for food.  I was so done.  Just feeling this deep conviction of where in the world does my Bible say, "give to the poor...unless it is dangerous or you are enabling them." No where.  Sick.  So we collected a bunch of rolls from dinner, and gave them to this one little girl first who could easily be taken to Hollywood, and put on a movie set.  She was skipping from person to person asking for food.  Then she saw a person in a wheelchair, skipped over to them, and pushed them out of the road.  Then she just skipped on to the next person..."Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom".

"You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing.  you have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy." (Ps. 30:11)

The face of Jesus...

 Up to this point Jason kept saying to me (since I carry it), "give me so money", and trying to stick to the rules I just ignored him:/, because there were so many people, but my heart wouldn't let me ignore anymore.  I just kept picturing my own girls having to ask strangers for food, and constantly getting turned down.  There probably is a time to say no, but now wasn't that time.  And I'm guessing God's heart as a father was broken every time another person turned down meeting these peoples needs.  

 ³⁵ For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. ³⁶ I was naked, and you gave me clothing...

³⁷ “Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? ³⁸ Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? ³⁹ When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’

⁴⁰ “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters,^[f] you were doing it to me!’⁴² For I was hungry, and you didn’t feed me. I was thirsty, and you didn’t give me a drink. ⁴³ I was a stranger, and you didn’t invite me into your home. I was naked, and you didn’t give me clothing. I was sick and in prison, and you didn’t visit me.’

⁴⁴ “Then they will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?’

⁴⁵ “And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.’(Matthew 25)

We returned to our room.  Jason was quiet.  I could tell he was feeling some of the same feelings I was, but they were all over the place.  I knew I should feel some encouragement that Joshua played, smiled some, giggled some, and he even waved goodbye.  But all I could think about is...why isn't he talking?  I know, a bunch of white people up in his face, his own mother just left him forever (if he even realized that), he was woken up from a nap, he has to be so confused.  But then why were the other children talking?  And this isn't just a thing where he was, but isn't now.  He just hasn't yet.  And then I know Caleb didn't seem to be feeling great, but all 5 of the other babies seemed to say with their smiles and giggles, "Will you be mine?".  Don't misunderstand... in no way was I wishing any of the other children were ours instead, but why out of both places did our 2 boys seem to want us the least?  

Jason went into the bathroom to take a shower, and I couldn't contain my emotion anymore.  The same feelings rushed over me as when Kami was born.  Fear.  Unknown.  What if?  Kami had obvious physical anomalies.  We had no idea...would she be mentally impaired?  Did she have other physical problems that we just couldn't see?  Same feelings.  Not a questioning of are we in over our heads (although felt that some), and also not a question of should we back out.  No way.  But just fear, and unknown.  And underneath all of that was this unsettling sadness.  I could not get the image of my own daughters on the streets begging for their next meal.  I was starting to miss them.

Jason re-entered the room, and quietly asked me what was behind the tears.  I could barely talk, but he totally knew.  I'm kind of a sucker for hearing him say, "It's going to be ok?".  I know, I know, like that phrase changes everything!   But he didn't say that, because he didn't know either.  We cried and prayed and chose to trust God.  He knows our fears.  He knows the future.  

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).  We pleaded for hope and encouragement.  He had things under control.  And he had a plan...